"Well I'm baaaaAaaack, I'm back, baaaaaAAaack, I'm back, BAAAaaaack, I'm back, BAAAaaaaaAack,"
The good ol' rock ballad of AC/DC's "Back in Black" fulfills our ears as we look to be traveling down an undeserted countryside highway.
"Yoshii back! Yoshii baaaack. Yoshii back!"
Yoshii, the massive five hundred plus pound sumo sits in the vehicles passenger seat singing his heart out to the classic.
A hand reaches over from the left and turns the radio off.
"Alright! That's enough of that. My ears can only take so much!"
Yoshii turns his head towards Jed and frowns.
"But...Yoshii back, Jed. Yoshii back UTA."
Jed nods his head in agreement. It was only three nights ago that the Japanese icon made his return to the UTA in his home country and town for that matter, Tokyo, Japan. International Affair has been on the big mans calendar for quite sometime. The anticipation grew larger and larger by each tick of the clock.
You see, nearly a year ago, Yoshii shockingly had come to the decision to untimingly retire from professional wrestling and head back to Japan. Thus coming off of a heartbreaking loss to UTA super-villian, Perfection. It was Yoshii's dream to come to the United States of America and put his presence on the wrestling world. I guess to him, he thought what he had accomplished was enough.
"Yes, yes, I know that big guy. There's a REASON I wanted you back. There's a REASON WE need to pick up where we left off before you went into hibernation."
Jed Dye was left in limbo while the man who employed his services left the country and left him high and dry. What is one supposed to do with all his ammo but with no gun to fire it off with?
"WE were at the peak, Yosh. We were at the peak of our journey. Just because one little twerp took your- OUR gold isn't a good enough reason to leave me in the dumps."
Yoshii frowns again.
"Yoshii no wanted to hurt Jed. Yoshii was homesick. Yoshii miss home. So Yoshii make decision to sumo again. Yoshii did well. Yoshii thankful for Jed."
Yoshii reaches over with his hand and pats Jed's shoulder. Jed smiles.
"Of course you did you big goof! I'm just tying to look out for what's best for you buddy. That's why when I had the vision, the vision of me and you reclaiming glory, I KNEW it was time to get you back and for US to do what we do best. DOMINATE."
Jed looks into the distance and sees an exit sign that reads 'Montreal 178'. He turns his blinker on and turns the wheel to take the exit.
"We're back alright, BACK with VENGEANCE! Muahahaha."
Jed raises his head up while doing his evil laugh, taking his eyes off the road. He starts going off the shoulder.
Jed QUICKLY snaps his head straight and instantly swerves back into the lane.
Yoshii turns his head slowly at Jed, and shakes it from side to side.
"Now, where was I? OH! Yes, yes. Vengeance. Did you see the look on that crybaby's face? Perection stood there all like 'Oh no. Jed Dye and Yoshii are here. Wahh wahh, this is my moment, wahh wahh.' What a loser he is. In time Yoshii, in time. However for now, we're on to Montreal!"
Yoshii pounds the roof of the car and the both cheer. He reaches down to turn the radio back on. Jed smacks his hand away. Yoshii brings his hand back, holding it.
"Not just yet, Yosh, not just yet. We've been gone for quite some time. Almost a year. We've missed a lot in that stretch....that's why I took upon myself to scout the heck out of the rest of the nerds in the UTA over the last month or so. Reach back and grab that binder."
Jed tilts his head back in the direction of the backseat. Yoshii looks back there and sees a binder full of note paper and folders. It looks very similar to papers we've seen on UTA programming over the last month. He reaches his massive arm back, nearly crushing Jed as Yoshii's side leans on him. He brings the binder to the front.
"Jed write book?!"
"No, no, no! I took NOTES. This is top secret information on every single rostered employee of the UTA. I gathered the information myself, so you know it's top of the line. Turn to page thirty."
Yoshii licks his thumb and begins turning pages. After what seems to be an eternity to Jed, Yoshii FINALLY gets to page thirty. There is the name and picture of a man. A Hawaiian shirt. Black skin. Shades. Not Jed's choice of wardrobe.
"Look at that filth. The guy calls himself Lisil Jackson. Some Jamaican bobsled wannabe I'm sure. No disrespect to the movie though."
Cool Runnings...another classic.
"This is our first obstacle. We, YOU need to take this weirdo down and show the rest of the UTA that we mean business. No funny stuff, Yosh. Jackson MAY look like a cool dude to YOU, but let me tell you, HE'S FAR from a good person."
Yoshii taps Lisil's picture with his finger.
"Yoshii like shirt. Mr. Jackson good taste."
"Wh- did you not just listen to what I said?!!!"
Jed reaches over with his hand and grabs the binder and throws it back into the backseat. He shakes his head.
"I don't need you looking for a new wardrobe...LOOK...Yoshii, Jackson is into that voodoo stuff. I'm sure it's that weird Shaaman type stuff too. You know what I'm talking about?"
Yoshii instantly looks scared.
"Jed say voodoo??? Yoshii NO LIKE VOODOO though."
"Exactly. Which is what we need to eliminate at Victory. We need to eliminate ANY chance of him using that spooky garbage on us. Can I depend on you for that?"
Yoshii nods his head as his face is fully of worry.
"Yoshii try hard. Yoshii no voodoo on him. Yoshii protect Jed!"
Jed looks out his driver side window and grins. He's got him where he needs him. He looks back forward.
"Good. Good. The sky is the limit this time for us Yoshii. I can promise you one thing, with MY guidance and with YOUR power, there's going to be no one who can stop us from DOMINANCE! Muahahaha!"
They both do their evil laughs and Yoshii pounds the roof. He reaches down and turns the radio back on...
PURE JAMAICAN AND REGGAE ICON BOB MARLEY BLASTS on the radio.
Yoshii starts grooving.
Jed's eyes expand to the size of ping pong balls and thinks to himself...
JED DYE (to himself)
"Oh my- NO...he's on to us already....VOOOOODDDDDOOOOOOOOO!!!"