Title: Old Folks Home
Featuring: Kendrix
Date: 30th November 2015
Location: Paoli Indiana Nursing Home
Show: Wrestleshow #49

The scene opens up to a tranquil and relaxed foyer area. Calm classical music is quietly played out of the speakers. We see an attractive young woman dressed in secretarial attire, glasses included with her blonde hair tied up in a bun, sitting at reception getting on with her day to day duties. Behind her we see a welcome entrance sign of Paoli Nursing Home. However, the calm and tranquillity of the home is abruptly ended upon the moment that the entrances automatic doors open along with a familiar sounding greeting;

Kendrix: Alrigghhttt maaattteeee!!

Looking up over the front desk, shocked at the brash introduction, the receptionist sees Kendrix approach. Hair tied back in a man bun and dressed in a “Too Cool” Chris Hopper tee shirt, pink chinos and boat shoes, Kendrix holds a reef of flowers spelling out “RIP” in one hand with a huge grin on his face;

Receptionist: Excuse me Sir, not so loud...please consider our guests;

Gesturing with a nod of her head towards two old men sitting in the corner looking up at Kendrix, with their mouths wide open, confused at the loud interruption to their game of chess, revealing very few front teeth. Kendrix staring back down at them looks disgusted as he scrunches his face up;

Kendrix: Ugh...

Quickly looking back at the receptionist, realising she’s quite hot, he quickly changes tact and as he approaches her desk he tilts his head apologetically towards the old men;

Kendrix: Uh, JFK means, apologies old geezers, didn’t mean to interrupt your game of draughts, innit?!

Laying the reef down on top of the front desk he slams the palm of his hand down on the bell a couple of times to gain the already gained attention of the receptionist who, visibly annoyed at Kendrix, plants her hand down firmly on top of his in order to stop the incessant ringing;

Receptionist: Sir, Can I help you?

Kendrix looking down at her hand on top of his, grabs it gently and manoeuvres it onto the desk;

Kendrix: Now now…

Checking out her name tag (Raquel) while getting momentarily lost in her cleavage he returns his focus to her stare;

Kendrix: Rachel…

She rolls her eyes at the mispronunciation of her name;

Raquel: It’s Raquel…

Smirking back at her Kendrix raises his eyebrow, not believing her for some reason

Kendrix: Are you sure that’s your name?

Before Raquel can get a word out she’s stopped in her tracks as Kendrix holds the palm of her hand before her face;

Kendrix: Listen yeah, that’s very unprofessional of you, just because JFK is a sexy beast, doesn’t mean you can hold his hand, innit?!

Not impressed at all Raquel trys to move things along quickly;

Raquel: Can I help you?

Kendrix smugly nods his head;

Kendrix: JFK hopes so sweetheart. Can you point him in the direction of a Mr Christopher Hopper please, he has a gift for him.

Holding the flowers up in one hand and pointing at them with the other, grinning widely while Raquel turns to check her computer. Squinting her eyes at the results she looks back at Kendrix;

Raquel: I’m sorry sir there’s no one by that name staying here. Are you sure that’s the right name? Are you a relation?

Taken aback somewhat, Kendrix’s eyes narrow in confusion;

Kendrix: You what love? JFK, related to Hopper? Nah maaattteee, JFK ain’t no freak, yeah. Nah, JFK is a friend. You could even say that JFK is Chris Hopper’s best friend in the world ever…since it was JFK who retired his arse and put him in this god forsaken hell hole…

Raquel looks puzzlingly up at Kendrix:

Raquel: Who’s JFK? You mean John F Kennedy, isn’t he dead or something?

Kendrix slaps the palm of his hand to his face and shakes his head;

Kendrix: …just check your records again will ya’ sweetheart.

As Raquel checks the name on her computer once more Kendrix takes another opportunity to check out her cleavage, piercing his lips together, looking impressed with what he sees. As she turns back to face him she catches him looking at her.

Raquel: Got a good view from up there sir?

Nodding his head proudly he smirks and puts his hand modestly on his chest;

Kendrix: Listen yeah Rach…JFK’s flattered but he has a girlfriend. Now dry up, wouldn’t want you to slip off your chair now would we?

A face of pure shock mixed with a little bit of disgust comes across Raquel’s face;

Raquel: Ugh, there’s no Chris Hopper in our retirement home you asshole. Now if you don’t mind…

Nodding to her screen signalling how busy she is she turns her view away from Kendrix and on with her work. Meanwhile Kendrix slams his fist down on the front desk;

Kendrix: Dammit, that’s the third time that’s happened today, what are the odds? You’d think Hopper would be waiting to die in one of these damn places? Oh well.

Looking at his watch he scans the foyer area he pulls up a chair and takes a seat next to an old man quietly waiting for his children to pick him up and take him on a day out;

Kendrix: Hi there old geezer, how long have you got left then?

The old man points to his earpiece, not quite grasping what Kendrix had just said;


The old man just stares at him blankly before turning his head away. Kendrix notices that his earpiece isn’t switched on. Pointing at the piece, the old man realises his mistake and dutifully turns it on.

Old Man: I’m sorry young man, what were you saying?

Kendrix rolls his eyes;

Kendrix: Nevermind. Tell me pops, you know Christopher Hopper right, he’s about a hundred years old like yourself.

The old man thinks deeply, far longer than he should have to. So much so that Kendrix stares at his watch to check how much time has passed (it’s 10 seconds tops);

Old Man: Who?

Kendrix: That’s the spirit, bruv. Who? Nobody anymore that’s who. JFK isn’t one to brag but did you know that he is the very man…

He turns his attention momentarily away from the old man in thought before looking back at him;

Kendrix: Scrap that…did you know that JFK is the very HERO…who, at the UTA’s International Affair pay per view, finally put an end to Christopher Hopper’s unnecessarily long career. Boy, that thing dragged out didn’t it?

Struggling to hear and beginning to lose interest the old man turns to struggle out of his seat and leave, however, Kendrix puts his arm around his shoulder in a friendly and slightly overbearing fashion, forcing him to retake his seat;

Kendrix: JFK knows what you’re thinking geeze. And you’re right. JFK has saved the UTA from years and years of snore fests. JFK has saved the UTA from countless people changing the channel on their remotes with their grubby disgusting hands, week after week after week.

Looking skywards, towards the ceiling, he smiles thinking about the good he has done in the world;

Kendrix: You could say that JFK…is a saint.

He looks back down at the old man and patting him on his back;

Kendrix: Wouldn’t you bruv?!

The old man looks incredibly confused and looks at his watch, wondering where is children are so they can take him away from this man;

Old Man: Huh?!

At that moment, JFK removes his arm from the old man’s shoulders and holds both hands out in front of him, palms facing the old man;

Kendrix: Woah, woah, woah geeze! Steady on there, JFK thinks you’ve said enough today.

Using his hand, he mimics someone chatting incessantly;

Kendrix: You don’t stop bruv, JFK can’t get a word in edgeways. Give it a rest and listen, yeah?!

Holding his index finger to the back of his ear, Kendrix continues;

Kendrix: You see, that was the problem with Chris Hopper. Too much talk. Rambling on and on, week after week about how he was going to rid the world of the greatest faction known to man. TALKING…week after week about how he was gonna end Dynasty and go on to become the UTA World Champion.

He shakes his head, albeit with a look of apparent disappointment splashed across his face;

Kendrix: Lies. Every week JFK would hear this man, this legend of our business. A man who over the space of twenty years in the industry had seen and done it all. A man, who used to get the fans out of their seats, roaring with excitement at what he used to be able to do.

Opening his arms out in front of him and turning his body to accompany his next words;

Kendrix: Icebreaker after Icebreaker. Title after title. Chris Hopper was a man the people wanted to see. He was the reason the people paid good money to companies throughout the world.

Looking back at the old man JFK smirks;

Kendrix: But as you well know old man, every dog has its day innit?! Unfortunately for Chris, he just didn’t know when to quit. He tried, but his emotions stopped him. So it took the future of the business to step up and do exactly what he said he was going to do all along…

Looking away from the old man and out in front of him, his eyes focussed and his arm outstretched in front of him;

Kendrix: And save him from himself. JFK put that old man out of his misery at International Affair and at the same time...cemented his status as the undisputed future of the UTA.

The old man offers Kendrix a chocolate interrupting him mid flow. Kendrix just looks at it with contempt;

Kendrix: What the hell is this, bloody Forest Gump? Ugh, no, get that out of JFK's face bruv;

Lightly pushing the old man's hand away from him, he continues, holding his hand by his heart;

Kendrix: Now honestly bruv, JFK thought that once he'd retired that old fool, so soon after singlehandedly defeating the Mental Rapist, Sean Jackson...that UTA management would be taking JFK seriously.

Dismissively chuckling he leans forward, resting his arms on top of his thighs and strokes his beard;

Kendrix: But instead of being rewarded for his heroics...instead of being handed a title shot as thanks for his efforts, you know, doing the world a service by getting rid of Chris Hopper...

Looking over at the old man with his arms out wide by his side to accompany the obviousness of his last comment;

Kendrix: They put the future of the a match with…

Shaking his head as he runs his hands through his hair in clear frustration;

Kendrix: Luke...Dibbins.

He momentarily hangs his head in his hands, exhausted at trying to figure out why and how this has been allowed to happen. Upon receiving a comforting couple of pats on the back from the old man, Kendrix arches his back up straight acknowledging the old man's kind gesture, letting out a long sigh;

Kendrix: Seriously? WTF bruv? huh?!

The old man gets up to leave once more but Kendrix puts his hand on his shoulder and sits him back down again before pointing at him;

Kendrix: JFK should be put up against the best that the UTA has to know, he's earned a bit of career progression after all. Instead he has to share an actual wrestling ring...with a man who probably thinks it's just somewhere to sleep for the evening.

Rolling his eyes he continues;

Kendrix: But you know what, that's just fine with JFK. You know JFK, he's not one to complain. Because, you see, it doesn't matter who’s put in front of him...whether it's the likes of Sean Jackson and Chris Hopper...or the likes of Luke Dibbins. JFK will always have his arm raised in victory at the end of the match.

He rudely holds two finger up at the old man;

Kendrix: Now, this is the second time JFK is going to kick Luke Dibbins arse. Funny thing is, the former Hardcore Champion has probably forgotten because, let's face, it...he’s got the brain capacity of a fish.

As Kendrix chuckles at his own comparison he looks at the old man, realising that he’s not chuckling along with him, he flicks the back of his hand lightly across the old man’s chest, who reacts with a somewhat forced chuckle of his own;

Kendrix: But last time we met, JFK and CBR kicked the shit out of Luke and his equally stupid brother Duke...right before they kicked us square in the balls…

He looks down at his groin area and gives it a feel to check if his balls are still in-tact, the thought of them getting brushed, let alone kicked again, is something that truly haunts him;

Kendrix: Which idiotically cost them a match they had no place participating in in the first place. Now, don't get JFK wrong, he knows they didn't mean to get disqualified...after all, it's JFK and CBR's fault really, we have massive balls...even those two hicks couldn't miss!

Grinning smugly at the old man he pats him on the back;

Kendrix: But Luke Dibbins has nothing to worry about. JFK is gonna do him a favour at Wrestleshow 49, just like he did Chris Hopper a favour...and put him out of his misery. Since JFK is in this home, he's gonna make sure he reserves a room for Luke to hold up in...It's not just a retirement home...this place has a really good rehabilitation centre.

With that, Kendrix hands the old man the reef, patting him on his shoulder as he gets up to leave;

Kendrix: No need to thank me old man, that’ll save your family money when it’s your time.

Fade Out.


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