Title: Seats Taken, Yeah?!
Featuring: Kendrix
Date: 24th December 2015
Location: In the air (Prior to After Hours episode 3)
Show: Wrestleshow 51

The scene fades into a late night business class cabin area. The area is sold out and covered in darkness barring the illuminated signs above the spacious seats, the bathrooms and two seating areas situated alongside each other towards the right hand side of the cabin, illuminated brightly by their individual overhead lights. In one of the seats sits an individual dressed in a black hoodie, wearing shades and sporting a rather hipsterish man bun in front of his laptop.

A stewardess, dressed impeccably with her dark hair tied back and skirt respectably short but still short enough to entice attention, approaches the individual’s seat. Impressed with what he sees standing before him he greets her in a way only this individual really can;

Allrriiigghhhtttt maaattteeee!

Arching his seat back Kendrix relaxes as he spreads his legs open slightly, throwing the young woman a cocky wink;

Kendrix: What can JFK do for you sweetheart? Wanting a photo with the new Prodigy Champion he suspects?!

The Stewardess politely smiles before squatting down as she looks out at the aisle behind Kendrix’s seat gesturing kindly for someone to come over. At that moment an excited plump looking child, wearing a Kendrix ‘Get Over It’ t-shirt, waddles over and takes her hand;

Stewardess: Mr Kendrix, sir. I hope you don’t mind but this brave young man noticed you getting on the plane today and he’s a big fan of yours.

Removing his shades and resting them on his head Kendrix looks at the grinning child with a less than impressed look upon his face before looking back at the Stewardess with the same look;

Stewardess: I appreciate you’re busy but would it be too much to ask if he could get an autograph and fly business class in the seat beside you for the remainder of the journey?

Kendrix takes another look at the kid and then back at the Stewardess, his mouth open wide in both shock and confusion at her request;

Stewardess: Do you mind, there’s only another thirty minutes of the flight remaining and would mean so much to would fly by, oh..haha, pardon the pun!

Kendrix, struggling to come to terms with the audacity of the request and how hot the Stewardess is, fakes a little chuckle at her unintended pun and rolls his eyes when she looks over at the child. Arching his seat back up straight he begrudgingly leans in towards the child;

Kendrix: What’s your name bruv?

The child looks over at the Stewardess who begins making movements with her hands. It’s only then that Kendrix clocks that the child is wearing a hearing aid and that the Stewardess is using sign language to communicate with him. With a huge smile on his face, the child looks up at Kendrix;

Child: Randy, Mr Kendrix, sir.

Kendrix momentarily looks away, rolling his eyes and shaking his head upon hearing the name. Biting his lip, stopping himself from saying anything that could get him in unnecessary trouble, after his last disturbance with Chris Hopper aboard a flight left him in jail, he picks up a pen from one of his seat pockets and scribbles his autograph on the child’s shirt;

Kendrix: There you go bruv. Now, jog on and try not to eat anything before we land, yeah?!

Dismissing the child and the Stewardess with a wave of his hand he turns his attention back to his laptop. However, he is disturbed once more by a tap on his shoulder from the Stewardess;

Kendrix: Listen, yeah?! JFK knows you want a special autograph from him in the bathroom but can’t you see JFK is busy right now?!

Gesturing his hands towards his laptop the Stewardess has her mouth open wide in shock at how rude Kendrix was;

Stewardess: Excuse me sir, would it be ok if Randy sat in the seat next to you too, it would be the perfect Christmas gift, you’d make his entire year.

The Stewardess forces a smile and points at the seat next to Kendrix. Looking over at the seat Kendrix’s facial expression changes from annoyance to immense smugness as his eyes fall upon his UTA Prodigy Title. Buckled up and proudly resting on a cushion the title is wrapped warmly in a blanket. Giving the title a polish with the side of his clenched fist, Kendrix looks back at the Stewardess and Randy with his previous expression, pointing his thumb back at his title;

Kendrix: Listen yeah, treacle?! This seats taken innit?!

The Stewardess is taken aback upon hearing the unexpected answer before uncomfortably laughing it off as some kind of joke;

Stewardess: Oh, I’m sure you can let little Randy here…

Kendrix holds the palm of his hand out flat in front of the Stewardess, cutting her off mid sentence, before looking over at Randy and then back at her;

Kendrix: Little? Just one moment;

He turns his focus back on the Prodigy Title and adjusts the blanket around it before tapping the belt twice, returning his focus to the Stewardess;

Kendrix: Ok…

Leaning in he brings the Stewardess’ name tag closer to him;

Kendrix: Britney...if that is your real name? JFK is going to address young Randal here so you go ahead and do your sign language stuff to translate, yeah?!

Letting go of the name tag, Kendrix turns his attention to Randy while Britney looks on in quiet bewilderment;

Kendrix: Randal...JFK could easily pick up his Prodigy Title here, place it on his shoulder or put it around his waist, like the champion that he is, allowing you to sit in the seat next to your hero for the best twenty five minutes of your life to date...and judging by the state of your weight, probably the greatest twenty five minutes you are ever likely to experience…

Kendrix looks to Britney;

Kendrix: You getting all this toots?

Britney looks incredibly cross but is intrigued to see where Kendrix’s explanation is going, so she simply nods her head and continues to translate;

Kendrix: However, this seat actually belongs to JFK’s Prodigy Title. That’s right JFK actually paid good money for a business class seat...for his title!

He patronisingly nods his head and widens his eyes at Randy;

Kendrix: Obvs, the expense of this seat is such that people like you could never afford...and yes...JFK found the cash for this extra seat down the back of his incredibly expensive sofa in his huge house...

He winks at Britney before facing Randy again;

Kendrix: JFK could let you sit here, but fortunately for you Randall, JFK is not going to allow this to happen. By rejecting your request, JFK is not only doing you a favour in your development as a human being...but, more importantly than the insignificant future of your existence, JFK would be doing an absolute disservice to his Prodigy Title.

Picking up the title he raises it proudly in front of his face, momentarily distracted by his own reflection, he wipes back a loose strand of hair that had fallen out of place during the turbulent flight. Refocussing on Randy, he undoes the strap and places the title over his shoulder;

Kendrix: You see Randal...this title here has been disrespected for far too long by people who can’t see past the end of their own nose. By People, who can’t see the bigger people who hand opportunity after opportunity to undeserving superstars over and over again.

Looking at the belt he rotates his shoulder and neck, stretching out before smirking at Britney and back at Randy. Removing the belt from his shoulder he holds it out at the child with both hands;

Kendrix: Here you go little bruv…go ahead and hold the belt;

Looking over at Britney with his mouth open wide in anticipation, Randy looks back at Kendrix who encouragingly nods at him to grab his big moment. However, as he reaches out for the belt, his expression changes in what seems like slow motion, from excitement to utter despair as Kendrix pulls the title away from his reach draping it over his shoulder once more;

Kendrix: Not today, Randal! You see, right now you may not understand...and quite frankly, odds are you probably will never understand, but JFK has taught you an invaluable lesson... about respect.

Randy looks upset as Britney tends to him, rubbing his back;

Kendrix: Nevermind that Britters...keep translating!

Shaking her head in disgust at Kendrix she begrudgingly continues;

Kendrix: JFK has worked tirelessly ever since he arrived in the UTA at the very start of 2015. Beating legend after legend, joining and destroying Dynasty, the greatest stable in the history of the business, becoming one half of the Hollywood Bruvs and...since you’ve reminded him…

He points at Randy’s t-shirt with his index finger;

Kendrix: JFK can’t believe that he almost forgot, thanks little bruv!...but did you know, that JFK RETIRED CHRIS HOPPER AT INTERNATIONAL AFFAIR?!

Shushing can be heard as Kendrix’s outburst has woken a few passengers from their late night flight slumbers;

Kendrix: In doing so, JFK has the entire UTA’s respect. But unlike JFK, in the course of the same year, this belt was unceremoniously butchered by its champions, forcing it into retirement and even to this day it fails to appear on the UTA website’s homepage!

The stewardess opens her mouth to interject but is cut off by Kendrix’s outstretched palm before her once more;

Kendrix: But despite all the disrespect, all the meaningless champions who held it, everything that belt represented in 2015 was fittingly put to bed the moment JFK, defeated FOUR...UTA superstars, in one Seasons Beatings…

Kendrix holds four fingers up at Randy, before slapping the title on his shoulder;

Kendrix: WRESTLESHOW 50! The night JFK’s unstoppable debut year in the business...was FITTINGLY...capped off in glorious fashion...ending the year with UTA GOLD...around his waist.

He removes the belt from his shoulder and holds it out in front of Britney and Randy;

Kendrix: And who better to hold the title then JFK? Who better, than the man who personifies what a Prodigy truly is. Who better, than the the UTA has?

Looking away from the two he shakes his head and scoffs;

Kendrix: Fact of the matter is, nobody comes close. Yet, unsurprisingly, nothing has changed in the UTA. The decision making process in this company is ridiculous! JFK is being forced to defend his title against El Trebol Junior in Cleveland, Wrestleshow 51.

Smiling at the thought of his first title defense he strokes his beard and returns his gaze down at Randy;

Kendrix: A man, not much taller than yourself Randy...certainly in better shape though. A man who, much like yours truly, has taken the UTA by storm in his early career here. A man, like yours truly, is on fire right now. A yours truly...who recently beat the Mental Rapist himself, Sean Jackson.

Pointing aggressively towards Randy, Kendrix grits his teeth;

Kendrix: JFK ain’t complaining that he has to defend HIS...title on January 4th. JFK ain’t complaining that he has to defend HIS...title in the first main event of 2016. JFK IS...complaining...that the UTA continues to disrespect both JFK and the Prodigy Title by giving anyone and his dog a title shot!

Shaking his head, he puffs his cheeks out in anger before composing himself;

Kendrix: While what Mr Junior has done in the UTA is commendable, 4 and 0, undefeated and taking down one of the greatest wrestlers of all time...should not be enough to warrant an opportunity at JFK’s title. The man has been here for five minutes and hangs around imbeciles like the inbred Dibbinses. Don’t forget, while El Trebol is 4 and 0...JFK has beaten four people in one night! This ain’t Proving grounds, and this ain’t After Hours...this is JFK’s show!

Arching his back up straight he turns the title around in his hands to face it;

Kendrix: El Trebol is here for the kids. To show people like you Randall, that despite the poor hand you’ve been dealt in too can achieve anything you set your heart to…

Kendrix holds his hand to his heart, looking skywards with an exaggeratedly noble shake of the head before jabbing his index finger twice upon his chest;

Kendrix: JFK is here...for JFK! Just like he’s always been. That’s why he’s achieved so much in one year as a pro. But the UTA have made their intentions quite clear. They need to even the odds by turning this one on one match, into a complete and utter installing BIAS...into the installing that voodoo freak, Lisil Jackson, as the special guest referee.

Looking out at his small audience he lets out a small chuckle;

Kendrix: Well, they certainly managed to get one thing right...Lisil, is definitely special! But despite that, the UTA are punishing JFK for saving Lisil at Seasons Beatings. For the record, JFK wasn’t pretending he was the ref, he was slapping his hand against the mat because he saw three bugs that were going to take a bite out of Lisil and Lew Smith, innit?!

He rolls his eyes, clearly and silently mouthing “can you believe that?”

Kendrix: But it don’t don’t matter cos the UTA have always thrown shit sandwiches JFK’s way ever since he stepped foot in the company.

Looking down at his belt he smirks;

Kendrix: Yet another reason why JFK and the Prodigy Title are a perfect match...the UTA tries to screw us over and over again. So the good news for El Trebol and every other challenger who tries to take JFK’s belt away from that, yes...JFK’s title will indeed be going places…

He opens his mouth wide in mocking shock;

Kendrix: But it won’t be around anyone else’s waist. It’s going places with JFK! The man who defied all the odds in 2015...will defy the odds the UTA have stacked against him on the 4th January...and continue his rise to the very 2016.

Putting the belt back on it’s neatly placed blanket, tucked up against it’s cushion, Kendrix looks back at Britney consoling Randy who has tears in his eyes. Kendrix sighs and gestures out at his laptop in front of him;

Kendrix: Now, if you don’t mind, JFK needs to send an email to his mum telling her he’s not coming home for Christmas as originally get out of here Randal!!

Britney shakes her head in disgust at Kendrix as she stands up and begins to usher Randy back to his seat in economy class. But before can get far, Kendrix grabs her by the wrist and winks at her;

Kendrix: Seriously though, meet me in the bathroom in ten, yeah?!

Scene fades out.


More Promos | View Kendrix's Biography